His name is Steven Simonar and he wasn’t famous until he got a $175 fine for not wearing a seatbelt during a police blitz in Saskatoon.  He didn’t have his seatbelt on and he got a ticket but today, he is fighting back blaming his disability and lack of common sense. Steven has no arms so owns the disability and the lack of common sense is owned by the police. Provincial Law is clear but also allows for medical exemption easily obtained by a doctor and processed by the licensing division of the government.  Steven claims he didn’t know about this exemption believing that since he can’t put one on, common sense should dictate the obvious and now that he has a ticket, it isn’t his fault.  Mr. Simonar; your perspective is deserving of respect and not having ever met you, I can only speculate on your motives and mean absolutely no disrespect.  But having spent significant time with Saskatchewan media today, you are going to think I am being exactly that.

I am taking the side of law enforcement.  I have been pulled over more times than I can remember for exactly the same issue and knowing how I am responsible for my driving and can’t wear a seatbelt, I made it a point as soon as the laws were passed to find out what I needed to make sure I wasn’t breaking any rules.  I am truly not suggesting I am better than you, just different in my belief system. I was also raised to see driving as a privilege not a right.  Mr. Simonar is also living a different reality as he lost his arms where I was born without them. That difference can be significant on psychology.  He has been able to adapt somewhat the same as me but his vehicle is a great example of our difference.  I do not have an adapted vehicle where he does.  I steer with my right foot on the wheel and left foot for the gas/brake.   I have also  been using me feet since birth but learning to use them in mid-life would be a major challenge so please understand I have great respect for what you have achieved, sir.  I have also not lived your recovery and that essence is my point.

I sense an anger at perceived mistreatment and not having been there, I can only speculate but I have over fifty years of experience and if there is one incredible irony, here it is.  I have never and will never expect special treatment and for people with disabilities who do, I am not judging. I am fairly clear that so called “normal” people have challenges of their own and all humanity deserves respect but overly sensitive, “politically correct” minority groups often struggle with what I am trying to say.  I am fully supportive of activism and have witnessed first hand what can and has changed since I was born.  Having said that, we are in 2013 and I  think pursuing “rights” has declining relevance as the clear majority of people I meet treat me very well, and that includes law enforcement.

Just pay the fine Steven, get your medical exemption and chalk it up to lesson learned!

I am very excited today about officially introducing my new “brand”.  Ironically, I have been thinking, acting, expressing and well…living this idea my whole life and today I am formally recognizing it as a focus for my work.

Honestly, the speaking business is full of people who are constantly re-branding themselves and I don’t say that as a bad thing.  In fact, it can be a very good thing if it benefits our clients and audiences.  It can also be shallow and self-indulgent which is of course, the opposite benefit.  In my case, I am clearly hoping the former rather than the latter is true.  I also want to stress this is not a move motivated by desperation.  Many in our industry felt that desperation when the economy tanked and the sad stories are countless so I am not insensitive to reality but I was very fortunate that although our business took a hit, we did what we have always done…kept at it with gratitude.  That gratitude has given us back so many elements,  and enlightenment is one.

 

The “Two Truths” is not an original thought or expression.  When you search the words on the net, you find many references but my favourite is the Buddhist tenant that addresses non-enlightened versus enlightened and in typical Buddhist fashion, it is non-judgemental.

I am not a practicing Buddhist and I am not claiming their form of enlightenment which usually involves a lifetime as a monk and constant pursuit of spiritual clarity. But my own pursuit of answers has led me down this amazing path to understanding what the two truths  mean to me.  Ironically, what I will officially dub “Alvin Law’s Two Truths” is in its own way that essence.  It will be a new motivational program for the stage, probably be the “next book” everyone that read the first one have been asking me about and  be a great media interview, but my intention is less a “product” than a belief I want to share so anyone who wants to consider it may reach their own “truth”; something we are all after.

Let me give you one simple example as clearly, there will much more to come.  Consider a topic I have addressed in every speech I have ever given…my Mom.  In case you are not aware, my birth family made the difficult choice to give me up shortly after my birth in large part after doctors diagnosed I would be void of any abilities or quality of life…one truth as they completely believed it.  I was placed in the system and taken in by older foster parents Hilda and Jack Law who were given the same opinion by the same doctors but with no judgement on those experts, my foster parents, the only people I ever called Dad & Mom, simply believed something else; that I would find a way to cope, even thrive.  Obviously my parents were right but this isn’t a game where someone is “right” and someone is “wrong”.   I view it as a way to see the world but more important, a way to live our lives.

Stay tuned as I am very excited not for re-invention but for further truth that I can only hope will help anyone who wants to better their existence.

February 12, 2013 is a special day here in Canada.  Sponsored by telecommunications giant, “Bell Let’s Talk Day” is celebrating the third year of a campaign that is a long time coming.  I am not a mental health expert but as a motivational speaker, I am constantly focusing my attention on matters of the heart and the head and where the heart’s function in our romantic lives may never be understood, the head needs some help.  Unfortunately, the stigma surrounding mental health still exists but as I can relate, we have come light years in our perception of persons with a disability and we need to do the same for this incredibly important subject.

Frankly, I have always felt that the power of our attitude is underestimated and that isn’t just me singing from my own hymnal.  In case you don’t know, I was born without arms in 1960 and pretty much written off by experts, even to where my birth family gave me up before I was a week old.  But as my story goes, I was taken in by Hilda and Jack Law who were part-time foster parents and would become the only Mom and Dad I would ever know.  Even more remarkable was that Mom was 55 and Dad was 53 when I came home with them and although my Dad was an incredible man, my Mom was the most amazing person I ever knew.  I feel strongly that all my success is because of her.   True, I did a lot in overcoming my obstacles but Mom gave me the intangibles.  One of those was my mind.  I believe my mind provided a huge benefit in stoking the attitude that lit a fire under my butt.  There were times I believed I could do “anything” and I am completely aware of how fortunate I was in having such a loving and supportive family.

It probably would be no surprise to know that my mental health suffered at the hands of those who didn’t see me in such a positive light and as anyone with a pulse is aware, that is the focus of all the “bullying” discussions in current affairs.  ”Suicide attributed directly to bullying” is a much too frequent headline these days and even worse….inaccurate!  While bullying does exist and does have an impact, teen suicide is about mental health, as are all suicides!  But this blog isn’t about bullying just how it affected me as a young person so I can relate.

Ironically, my depression was spiked by the frequent visits to rehabilitation hospitals for 14 years until 1977 but again, Mom helped me cope by constantly nursing my mental health.  My real hit came in 1996 when my beloved mother, Hilda, died.  Even though she was 90 and lived a long and remarkable life, I felt her loss like a sledge hammer to the head.  Odd isn’t it?  Nobody can teach us how to handle the death of a parent and generally speaking, not to mention thankfully, we don’t have to use that experience too much.  I expected sadness and went through the predictable stages of grief.  I also expected depression but always thought it was a simple descriptor rather than a medical condition.

In another irony, my Mom and my wife, Darlene are two of the strongest women I have ever met and since Mom was awesome and calling me on my bullshit, so is Darlene.  With the passing of my mother, Darlene gave me a ton of slack but after six months and keeping in mind my son was 10 at this point,  she finally sat me down one day and literally stated “Enough”.  Unfortunately, it sparked a pretty ugly argument that ended with my screaming “Fine!  I will go to my doctor but it won’t help!!!!”  I was wrong.

I have been fortunate in so many ways in my life and having a great doctor was one.  He applauded (literally actually) my coming to see him, explained the chemical imbalance that my funk had created and prescribed an herbal treatment including St. John’s Wort that broke the cycle and was profound in my recovery…at least that’s what I thought.  Again, I am not an expert but knowing what I know now, the herbal cure may have corrected my chemical imbalance, my focus on getting better was all attitude and although I have gone through a bout here and there, I have handled them.  Even when my Dad died in 2001, my grieving was much shorter lived and the learning from my Mom’s death was huge.

The greatest thing about Let’s Talk Day is just that…Let’s Talk!  I had to get help going to the bathroom until I was 28 years old when I had my clothing adapted to fix that little challenge.  Imagine asking sometimes complete strangers to help you go to the bathroom…it was brutal.  But I did it.  So Can You!  Let’s not just talk but let’s work together to remove yet another stigma in our world and in the process, make that world a better place to live.  It is possible…I should know!

Some of you may not like this blog and I really don’t care. As I have mentioned many times  my blog is not what I do on stage, for rather obvious reasons.  Why is there a such a separation?   Frankly, on stage I believe I am representing my clients so I apply a rule of appropriateness loosely based on standards of political correctness.  Ironically, it is my honesty that has brought me my clients.  When I blog, I represent myself and nobody else, not even my wife.

 

This morning, the news is buzzing about Chief Theresa Spence and Cree elder, Ray Robinson, who have simultaneously ended lengthy hunger strikes today and let me be extremely clear; I hope their health is intact and thankfully they chose to quit before bringing serious harm to themselves.  Remember, I have made my living based on a sensitivity to people.  But I also know when to call BS.  This whole “Idle No More” movement and all the vitriol about racism and degradation is BS.  The spewing of inequity and poverty on reserves is mostly BS and I say “mostly” because I have witnessed first hand the deplorable conditions we Canadians have been privy to through a bleeding heart liberal media placing all the blame on a arrogant government who don’t care about what happens to the Indian people in Canada.  By the way, I also don’t care what words we use when referencing these people.  We aren’t supposed to call them “Indians” so somehow, “First Nations” or “Aboriginal” corrects the general perception and I don’t believe it does.

 

I know about this because I have lived through many similar arguments regarding “disability”.  Is it “crippled”, “handicapped”, “physically challenged”…blah, blah, blah.  By the way, many in the activist community of disabled folks don’t like me much because of my misguided approach.  In 1986, I was a member of the Canadian Access Awareness Week organizing board, a government sponsored group whose mandate was to create materials and programs for a special week in June to promote awareness of disabled people.  In one early meeting, I got into a heated debate with a fellow committee member who happened to be a quadriplegic caused by a diving accident (he dove into a pool that had a big sign “No Diving”).  Our debate was centred  on the difference between “disabled persons” and “persons with a disability”.  From a pure marketing view for visual displays, the first descriptor has two words, the latter, four.  His deal was you have to put “persons” first because they are people not “disabled” first because the focus is negative.  Honestly, not a bad argument.  The point is he was really hostile and got so upset with me he blurted out at me, “What do you know about being disabled!”   Really?  I guess having no arms doesn’t qualify.  Thus my argument.

 

People like that guy, Theresa Spence, Ray Robinson and a parade of angry people are ironically  ”two-faced”.  They scream they are only asking for equality but I don’t think so.  They are asking for “special treatment”.  In the case of disabled folks, whom I understand the best, they “expect” society to “get it”.  I do not.  Clearly, I believe awareness is much needed and also understand there are many physical accommodations like washrooms, doorways, curb-cuts, etc. that have literally changed life for those with mobility challenges.  Clearly, the dire needs of some reserves require urgent attention as nobody, including yours truly, should celebrate someone’s misery.  What is misguided to me is the tone.

Clearly, I have been angry many times in my life.  I have felt prejudice, been disrespected, made fun of, picked on, called names and had my dignity harmed more times than I can count.  In fact, and this is going to be very honest; I hated Indians when I was a kid.  I was an equal opportunity target but the kids who led the pack were Indian kids at my school.  They had moved from neighbouring reserves and as they were also Catholic, they went to St. Alphonsus Catholic school, right across the street from our home.  They not only went to school there, they played there after school too and in many ways, “owned” the playground.  By the way, I wasn’t the only target and not every native student was bad but there were four of them, two in particular (I would rather not name them) who were just plain mean.  They broke equipment, would stay out late, even had the police called on them (not by my family) on a couple of occasions and they always got away with it because to punish them would be racist!  We never saw their parents at school events, let alone checking on them while causing trouble at the playground.  Unfortunately, their behaviour set the standard for the community’s opinion on native folks.  I really mean “unfortunately” as my negative and yes, racist attitude extended to all native people, and I’m pretty sure I am not alone here.

 

In 1981, I had a job with the Saskatchewan Council for Crippled Children & Adults, since appropriately changed to the Saskatchewan Abilities Council.  I was 21 years old and understandably, pretty naive.  Ironically, I also had a prejudice to what we today call, “intellectually challenged” people and there were tons of them in our Saskatoon facility that housed both management offices and workshops where the clients essentially, if not inappropriately, made ceramics and wood products.  By the way, we see it being inappropriate today but not then.  My office was a tiny room in the main hallway that led from the front door to the workshop so every morning, dozens of clients would have to stop and say good morning, a very charming thing…that I had to learn was indeed charming.  The first six months, I didn’t see it that way.  I hated it.

 

Then one day, my boss and I were having an end-of-week beer at a local pub and I asked him what could be done about this annoyance.  I will never forget his answer; “You should be flattered and honoured by the attention.  They stop because they like you…what’s wrong with that?”  Good question.  So, I shifted my approach and embraced the morning ritual.  As a consequence, my whole attitude towards such folks changed, which opened the door to more growth I obviously craved.  I was so young that I indeed had a chip on my shoulder  and since my work with the Council was primarily community relations and advocacy, I met a lot of other handicapped folks in the same stream.  It seemed the more I spent time with these people, the angrier I was getting but not at them, at the world!  The general consensus at the time was you can’t advance a movement without protest and civil disobedience.  I played along for a while until something profound and even prophetic happened.

 

1981 was the International Year of the Disabled (you notice not “Persons with a disability”) and awareness was a major component so government made grants available and in Saskatchewan, I ran my own school awareness program through the Abilities Council so I got very busy.  I was invited to the north of the province and would end up spending two weeks travelling to several reserves speaking to native students and their communities.  I was very uncomfortable and it must have showed because locals kept asking me if it was my first time “Up North”.  I faked my way through the first week and having the weekend off and being too far to go home, I stayed on one of the reserves in a quasi motel without a television, something I truly didn’t appreciate.  I was invited to go fishing on the Saturday and since there wasn’t anything else to do, why not?  Until I found out it would be in a small aluminum boat with two Cree elders.  Honestly, I failed to see the charm and felt my racist pulse start to pound.  In keeping with my faking it, I decided to “talk a lot” which was easy because these old Indians didn’t say anything.  After heading to their favourite spot far from shore, we dropped our fishing lines (I had been fishing for most of my life spending summers at our cottage) and I just kept talking.  All of a sudden, one of the old guys whose name was Joe said, “Do you ever shut up?  You white people are all the same.  You come up here and bring all you southern stuff with you instead of leaving it at home and appreciating you are here, not there!  Besides, you’re scaring the fish!  Take as breath, close your mouth and embrace the day!”  Sounds a bit like a self-help seminar or an Oprah show, doesn’t it?  I was at first offended but then got distracted as my line had a hit and I reeled in a fair size Northern Pike.  I got the hint.   Spending a few hours on a pristine northern lake,  followed by a fresh fish fry over a campfire on the beach was a cure for more than my prejudice of Indians.  I can sincerely say it changed everything.

 

I know this sounds obvious but for a 21 year old, what I finally absorbed was every race has an undesirable element and there really is racism…theirs!  Minorities love to claim inequity and while screaming prejudice, some of their most vocal spokespersons are the biggest racists there are.  They scream they are treated unfairly but what does that mean?  I know this sounds remarkably judgemental but my parents didn’t raise a disabled child, they raised a person and the constant refrain was that I will never believe I am a victim, I will treat people the way I want to be treated and I will never, ever, ever blame the world for my problems.  Obviously, some of the rhetoric surrounding this issue has a point…things need to improve in all sectors of society and especially on some reserves but it really is just “some”.  Consider this observation.

 

I have spoken in First Nations communities across North America visiting some of the most amazing, self-reliant reserves imaginable.  I have also visited reserves where the number of suicides among their youth was ten times the national average.  Am I the only person asking why?  More importantly, being recipients of government money means a consistent bureaucracy exists across Canada and all the rules are the same.  One of the most irritating elements is First Nations reserves are funded from all taxpayers of countless races across the country but when the spewing begins, it’s all about the “Whiteman”.  If that isn’t racist, what is?  Here’s one more: First Nations people are very proud but almost too much.  If they have challenges managing their affairs on reserve they are extremely hesitant to ask for help, especially their leaders.  Leadership knows no race…it is a human element and as all of us know, some are better than others at leading.

 

But I save the best for last.  Government is guilty for one thing in this country…patronization!  Pay attention government: Ottawa isn’t Canada!  It is in Canada and the seat of government but Canadians, all Canadians matter more.  While First Nations, Aboriginal, Native, or Indian (you pick the words) people deserve recognition for their history, so do the rest of Canadians.  Isn’t it more important where this country is going rather than where we come from.  When I look at how ignorant I was in 1981 and how much I have grown since then, imagine the lunacy of applying 200 year old standards, like treaties, to a 2013 reality.  We should all be embarrassed about the way we used to be.  Just watch the move “The Help” to see how much “Help” we really did need.  The way forward is never easy but can we please just get together on this, rather than further dividing a nation that the likes of Theresa Spence, Ray Robinson and other angry radicals seem intent on doing.  As to government, I am very proud (take this any way you like) that at no point in my life have I ever been on welfare, employment insurance or the like.  I worked hard, created a company have spoken on six continents to over 2,000,000 people including thousands of my native friends and the idea of letting ” Government” babysit me. They suck at it!  My native friends; you are made of so much more.

 

Hunger strikes? Blockades?  Protests?   Maybe you should all just shut up and go fishing!

 

 

Quite the day in the U S of A! Not only is it a holiday respecting the birth of Martin Luther King but the Inauguration Day for President Obama…not a coincidence I am sure. I find this a special day for me too.
It would be no surprise for those who know me that one of my personal heroes is Dr. King. True, I was very young when he gained fame for giving his life in the cause of American civil rights and being Canadian, his name was not as mentioned as south of our border. Yet, I have a very clear memory of something he said that not only resonated for me but truly became a guiding light in my life. To paraphrase; He dreamed of a world where people would not be judged by the colour of their skin but by the content of their character! Clearly, we are not all the way there but we are better than we were, because of people like King.
Now, and in what has to be the most obvious of revelations, we have a second term for a black man as President of the United States. I don’t know this but I feel safe assuming that Dr. King and his supporters also dreamed of a black president, but like many dreams, probably unattainable, yet here we are.

By the way, if you are wondering what a white guy without arms from rural Saskatchewan, Canada would find so heroic about a black civil rights leader from the Deep South of America? Well, first, he was right! I am far from perfect in my belief systems but one I am confident in is a belief that all people are human beings whose shade of skin, religious beliefs (or none), sexual orientation or language(s) spoken is secondary to who they are. Imagine how many times I am described by my physical characteristics? “He’s the guy without arms! Crippled! Disabled! Handicapped! Blah, Blah, Blah!”
My name is Alvin Law and while my having no arms is a significant element in my life and will always be what people see first, I have always hoped people could see deeper; and they have.

My world in 2013 is light years ahead of how it was in the 1960′s when I first considered these thoughts. One of my favourite examples is a much told story about my education. In 1966, there was zero inclusion of special needs children in regular schools. The idea was ridiculous but society accepted it without question. Today, society is in a completely different place, and it changed because of people like my parents who asked a simple question…”Why not!” It wasn’t simple, but the answers came and as a result, I got a proper education which led me to reach a potential I can guarantee would not have happened in the “old school thinking”.

Today, amongst many fine things President Obama said in his Inauguration Address, one stood out for me and for various reasons, it seems most folks. He challenged Americans (and I believe everyone around the world) to support civil rights for gay marriage and in my mind, this extends to those whose sexual orientation makes straight folks feel a tad uncomfortable. I need to be very blunt here: what happens in our bedrooms are nobody’s business! As long as it isn’t harmful or exploitative, it is supposed to be private, but alas, this subject is not private, thus a reference in a Presidential Speech! Obama also spoke aggressively and passionately about how America’s ideals were based on all people being created equal! I guess a few folks missed that meeting!

I could write about this for days but let me conclude by simply saying: Happy Birthday Dr. King. Your dream is closer than ever to coming true. Thanks for your action, your inspiration and your ultimate sacrifice to make not just America, but the world, a better place to live…for all of us!

So, let us all be very clear on my post today: I am so sad and I am so mad and the mass murder in Connetticut is the cause. It is, of course bothering all of us but what got to me this morning as I wasn’t certain I wanted to appear obvious in my comments was a news report on a “rush” by thousands of Americans on the weekend buying up thousands of guns worried about a gun ban by the government in response to the rather obvious. Really? Clearly, all “Americans” are not gun and violence mongers and the debate over “guns don’t kill, people kill” will never, ever end with any compromise and for non-Americans with like minds, most of us do not understand your obsession with “rights”. Critics of gun control are actually suggesting what would have prevented 20 innocent children and 6 educators from being mercilessly gunned down were armed teachers and administrators! Really? Let me be very blunt…the culture of guns and violence that pervades America is the real reason this and other mass murders occurr. I know the U.S. will never ban guns and I also know that even in Canada with gun restrictions, mass murders are ineveitable but the production of violent movies, television, video games, etc. is pervasive.
December 15 was the one year anniversary of the tripple homicide and suicide of four young people near Claresholm, Alberta. A 21 year old, Derek Jensen, was upset with an ex-girlfriend and after forcing her and three friends off the highway. he sprayed all four with bullets then killed himself. Miraculously, 21 year old Shayna Conway survived but Jensen’s ex, Tabitha Stepple, 21, Mitch MacLean, 20 and Tanner Crasswell, 22 did not. Stepple was driving here three close friends to the Calgary airport where the three Maritimers were catching a plane home to Canada’s East coast for Christmas. The press described the killer as “the last person anyone ever thought capable of this”. Doesn’t it seem the press always says that?

The truth is, every single killer in these horrible stories never seems to have “issues” when clearly they do. True, the debate over guns and rights will go on forever but what hasn’t been debated enough is the root cause of all…mental health!

During the Canadian Association of Professional Speakers annual national convention in Winnipeg, December 2-4 this year, yours truly and fellow speakers, Linda Edgecombe, Stu Schultz and Big Daddy Tazz presented a panel discssion to the delegates. All four of us were concerned the discussion would be inappropriate and uncomfortable for such a meeting, especially since of our group, only Tazz makes a deliberate effort of speaking to mental health and he does it through stand-up comedy. The response was completely opposite. At the end, the over 250 attendees gave a spontaneous, five minute standing ovation and following that were many hugs, kisses and tears. The support was overwhelming but the most consistent comment was the courage it took to address a taboo subject in a public forum and “It’s About Time” resonated through the hallways. People have a hard time discussing mental health and that makes sense but since I was a child, many taboos have been addressed and society has grown better as a result. Disablity issues are one I am most familiar with and although much needs to be accomplished, what has been done is huge and it all started with bringing “out of the closet”, subjects that people are uncomfortable with. The rather obvious sexual orientation is another elephant in the room and mental health has to be the next.

Because it may be true that guns don’t shoot themself, it is also true that guns in the hands of someone with mental health issues is like lghting the proverbial fuse for so many of these disturbed people.
While it may be true that an armed prinicipal at Sandy Hook Elementary may have saved the lives of these beautiful souls, the obvious mental stability of the killer may have never reared it’s ugly head if his issues may have been addressed sooner and as hypothetical as discussion as this may be, clearly buying more guns is not the answer.

Please, please, please, lets open another closet door and start talking about mental health because the most courageous thing a human being can do is ask for help, not snap a magazine into a killing machine.

Our hearts go out to all those who lost a loved on in this latest tragedy and all the tragedies that take lives with absolutely no reason at all. I can tell you that in my whole life, I have asked “Why” countless times and alhough answers may or may not come, my faith and beliefs cannot be shattered. As crass as the expression may be, “It is what it is” helps me get through the days when answers don’t come easily. Today is one of those days.
Namaste.

I could be writing about several annoying items for my rant zone as there is no shortage of stupid lately but having just returned from our annual gathering of my (our) peers, otherwise known as the Canadian Association of Professional Speakers (CAPS) National Convention. This year’s affair was held in Winnipeg and all the bad “Winterpeg” jokes aside, the organizing committee did a superb job of hosting 250 professional speakers (and the like), spouses and vendors who can often be a tad picky about these events. People are usually usually surprised when they find out there is a speakers assosciation and I was before I joined in 2000. What has never surprised me is how much the association (CAPS) has meant to Darlene and I. Oddly, you don’t have to be a member of our association to be a speaker and personally, I feel very strongly that it should be just like a doctor or lawyer where membership in your peer group is not an option but I digress.

In this short blog I simply want to point out one item. I have been on the so-called “main stage” of CAPS and our member nation’s, known as the Global Speakers Federation (GSF) events in the past and it is an immense honour but what I have always appreciated is having the right sense of what that honour is really all about. The short answer is “not me”! Too many speakers, including me in the distant past, think the podium is their personal ego zone and although it does take confidence to be a public speaker, ego is not the same. I know as well that without the speaker, there would be no speech but I like to think that without the audience, there would be no event and thus, no opportunity for a speech. At this year’s convention, I was asked to be one of four professional speakers to sit on a panel about mental health. Linda Edgecombe, Stu Schultz, Big Daddy Tazz and yours truly were asked to do a brief story about our personal journey through a mental health hit then answer questions. I spoke on my bouts of severe depression after I was shut out of the United States in 1995 when new regulations were introduced as part of the NAFTA (I now have an E-1 Visa for your info) and less than a month later, my Mom died. We were all quite nervous talking about this, although Tazz does present this in his normal material, but not because if the podium but because of the subject. Most people have a story of mental health whether their own direct hallenges or one of a loved one or friend. As Big Daddy stresses, the biggest issue is the stigma.

Well, not only was the program a success but the response of our convention was overwhelmingly positive. It was like pulling back the curtain and revealing the wizard is not always perfect.

Thanks to all my Wizard colleagues for not only embracing the cause but for all of your supportive comments in the last three days.

Mental health is exactly that. As I crudely said in my segment, men grow moustaches in “Movember” to promote awareness of Prostate Cancer so if we can get over a doctor poking their gloved hands up our butts, why is it so difficult to bring mental health out of the closet. To erase the stigma, we must dump the ego and the ultimate winners are those who can summon the courage to get help. I get alot of credit for being so amazing but I have always been clear that I didn’t do it alone and without help. Time to do the same.

Thanks everyone for all your support.

I am Canadian and I am elated the United States has finally finished their never-ending election by re-electing Barrack Obama for a second term; I can only imagine how Americans are feeling. Actually, I want to comment on what they are feeling as it seems pretty simple; 50% are elated and 50% want to launch a real-life re-enactment of the civil war. We get many Canadian television stations but most Canadians also get their majority of TV stations from the U.S. and without pointing too many fingers (can’t do that anyways) at U.S. smear campaigns as our polticians seem to be catching on up here too, but what is happening to our democracy????
Politics is one of those hot-button issues that one should keep private but as usual, I can’t keep this to myself. and with full disclosure, I ran for a seat in the Saskatchewan Legislature in the 1986 Provincial election in Regina and I ran for the Conservative Party! I lost (thank goodness) and although some good things happened, most of the process was truly pathetic. Obviously, people are passionate about their politics but where things get weird is how seriously some of the political machinery take an election. Clearly, public policy and elected representation is serious but it seems the further we go in civilization, the less civil we are getting.

I have written here in the past about the childish behaviour of our Canadian Members of Parliament, especially in the House of Commons, where the correct behaviour of statesman has long since disappeared in favour of partisan crap! True, the system isn’t completely devoid of principles but it seems to me that our elected officials keep lowering the bar when it is in great need of raising!

It seems like when Barrack Obama becane the first black President in 2008, the United States was showing signs of improving its partisan behaviour as the symbolism alone was an incredible sign of change. Alas, it was like a Saskatchewan Roughrider Grey Cup win; rare and after the hangover, nothing had changed. Common sense should dictate that we all want our team to win and if we lose we feel bad but must accept the result and if we have any class, actually congratulate the winners. Mitt Romney lost and gave a predictable speech congratulatng the winner and asking his party to cooperate with the successful democrats. It all looked good on the outside, but guaranteed, Republicans across America and around the world were wondering if there was anywhere they could move where the President was not Obama! Quite similar to the New Democrats in Saskacthewan after Brad`Wall got elected but ironically, completely backwards as Wall’s party is conservative. Losing sucks but it is the ultimatre “It Is What It Is”! But you can just feel it south of the border; opponents of Obama will do everythng they can to make life difficult and point to their political principles as the culprit.

Look, we must stand for what we believe and ironically, Romney may have lost because of his lack of conviction and a constant swaying back and forth wanting to please everyone but accepting a winner duely elected is simply part of democracy, if not the most critical element of it. When people can’t compromise, nothing changes and indeed change must take place. I read an anonomous quote recently that said, “Change is inevitable but growth is optional”. We will never advance as a society unless we put aside our differences in the wake of a win/loss and pull together for the greater good.

As a motivational speaker, I am privy to a podium to state my beliefs every day I work and I have strong convictions but I am very clear that just because I believe it doesn’t mean I am right! I respect other people’s point of view and only ask they respect mine. That sounds pretty simple, doesn’t it? So why are hundreds, if not thousands,
dying in places like Syria whose conflict is seated in a fight for democracy? Democracy must respect the status quo and move on but a country who claims to be the home of freedom and democracy seems a bit hyprocritical these days!
I have more American friends than I can count and as a country, I love working there but right now, they remind me of how one can feel about a challenging child; I love you but you need a metaphorical slap in the head!

Barrack Obama is the President now and if Americans want to truly pursue what made their country so great, time to put aside petty differences and start rebuilding a nation that is truly in danger of falling apart. C’mon America, you can do better, right?

This entry will be a teeny bit different than my last one and unfortuntely, a bit raw and rantish but here we go again! Another tragic teen suicide attributed to bullying. I really tried to ignore this and not blog about it but as you may know, the not so squeaky wheel needs some grease too. We all have an opinion, especially on this one but being 52 years old may suggest I am out of touch but please remember that growing up without arms in the 60′s meant zero political correctness and 100% struggle for identity so as old as I am, this is nothing new and repeating the chorus over and over and over again is doing nothing but fuel the fire that so many bleeding hearts love to bake their marshmallows on. Honestly, it almost seems like the news rooms secretly cheer when this kind of thing happens (I know they don’t) as they all sing from the same songbook that is intended to make all of us feel responsible for one struggling teen’s personal choice brought about by many complicated issues, one of them being bullying.

Let us be very clear…tragedy in one’s life isn’t a Jerrry Springer show where the drama is staged for ratings.  It is never okay for a person to have to struggle for equality or be marginalized by those who would exercise their power to demean or worse, cause deep pain. I have felt that emotion and again, I would not want to live it again. “Life isn’t fair!” seems to be the chant as if saying it enough times will make it so automatically. I am going to be blunt: I overcame the bullies with one principle; they can’t be fixed… but I can!

Anyone who actually knew me as a teen knows I was a world-class dweeb. My parents did their best but we were poor so I couldn’t “Nike, Polo and Gucci” my way to acceptance. Mom and Dad were in their 70′s when I was an adolescent so the last time they had a teen in the house was in late 1940′s…a tad different time! They struggled with my mental health, and so did I. Let’s use one simple example. I asked girls to dance at school sock hops, they said no so all girls hated me! Right? Wrong. Several girls would have danced with me but I wanted the popular girls so instead of recognizing I was wrong, I blamed all females and was convinced I would never dance, date or marry for the rest of my life. I have been married to my beautiful Darlene for almost 20 years but we met when we were over thirty!!!! Life Is Not Adolescence!!!! It can be unfair, confusing, depressing and downright impossible to navigate…that is precisely the point. People do not change without growth and growth is impossible without challenge and therein lies the ironic argument.

I have heard this so many times I want to throw up; “My parents were tough on me and I didn’t like it so I am going to let my children be kids. They won’t have any stress so their lives can develop without interruption or deviation from the goal of being the greatest child any parent has ever had. Maybe if I play my cards right, I’ll get a trophy for Parent of the Year. I can put it right on the mantle with all my other aquisitions that prove I am better than anyome aiive!!!” Okay, maybe I haven’t heard those exact words but boy, sure feels like it!
Kids aren’t stuff!! Also, kids do not grow into succesful adults without a few obstacles. Is it just me or isn’t one of the greatest parts of being human is when we accomplish something through our own hard work and dedication? People flatter me with my success all the time but do they really know how hard it was sometimes? C’mon. Imagine a life without arms! It’s okay, I will give you a minute. Pretty hard to actually get, huh? So when I tell people it was hard but worth the struggle, is that just a planned inspirational phrase? Not in my mind.

The solution to bullying does not exist and it never will. Legislation will do absolutely nothing and kudos to Calgary Police Chief, Rick Hansen, who during an interview regarding the alleged suicide of a Vancouver teen this week (Amanda Todd) stressed we already have laws to address bullying and more laws will do nothing but make bullying more adversarial than it already is. His “professional” opinion is simple; all the stakeholders need to dialogue more and blame less.

Ironically, it seems to me that people are more concerned about who is right rather than admitting nobody is; not even me. But if we dump the egos, tone down the rhetoric and attempt rational debate, perhaps we can give our youth the direction they sorely lack and thirst for every day.

Let us also remember that the clear majority of young people are awesome…I meet them every day in schools all across North America. Most of them don’t bully and most of them think all the drama is way over top. But most is not all and every now and then, we have a rare tragedy that reminds us all that life, let alone young life, is fragile and frought with obstacles but as the well-used expression turned website rightfully says; “It Gets Better”. Life does get better but it doesn’t just show up. Isn’t it time we start teaching kids that being happy isn’t a right, it is a destination that is within the limits of our imagination and doesn’t cost a cent. It is, however, very hard to earn. And like so many human pursuits, worth it…totally worth it!

So, if you follow my blog, you will have noticed I haven’t written for a long time and I make no apologies, by the way. One of the benefits of being self-employed is I have no boss, unless you count Darlene but for 24 years now, summer is very slow and after an adjustment to no paycheck for a couple of months, the bonus was lots of time so rather than seeing that as a negative, two months vacation is pretty cool so I have been very busy doing as little as possible. I also need to remove myself from pace of speaking and travelling which really does wear on one’s postive belief system and it’s just as well since summer is also he travel season for normal families who usually suck at it!

Since the 1950′s, the Law family has been very fortunate to call Crystal Lake, Saskatchewan our summer home and I can’t imagine a place with more meaning to yours truly, and now Darlene too (the dogs and cat seem to enjoy it a tad as well). I am certain people that are blessed with a summer cottage all believe theirs is the most beauiful so I will leave that alone but for me, it is also a chance to revisit my home province of Saskatchewan. For those of you unfamiliar with Canada, Saskatchewan is a prairie “province” with more geography than California and just over a million people. It is farming country and it is definitely rural. It has to patiently put up with bad jokes about being flat (which is only true for parts of the place) and for most of my life, also had to deal with socialist politics that often made the Kremlin seem progressive, but I digress. With all of it’s stereotypes, the one thing Saskatchewan has is pride and there is arguably nothing that brings out the most personal of feelings than the province’s only professional sporting franchise, the Saskatchewan Roughriders! Go to Riderville.com for more info but let me explain one thing; the Riders are owned by Saskatchewan. Not the government, the people. It has a volunteer board of directors and all profits from the team operations go right back to the team. It used to be that the team tended to be on the lower end of the spectrum financially. Small population, small stadium, limited corporate support, etc. Even worse, the team plays its home games in Regina which to bigger urban Canadian cities is a joke as well. One example would be if you got transferred from Toronto to Regina, you must have done something wrong. But to make reference to the game of football, the CFL (Canadian Football League) is pretty much only known to Canadians. Due to various reasons but mostly numbers, the CFL has historically been a league with more Americans than Canadians on the eight teams. The United States just has more players, especially coming out of College. The notion is that only the best of the best play in the NFL (National Football League) and those that fail, either quit or play in various poser leagues, one of them is the CFL.
Now here is another unwinnable argument because personal preference comes in play but I refuse to compare the NFL and CFL. They both play “football” which oddly is what most of thr world calls soccer, but that’s where the similarities end. NFL has 11 players, four downs, a hundred yard field and ten yard end zones. The CFL has 12 players, three downs, 110 yard field and 20 yard end zones. It is also a much smaller league as CANADA IS SMALLER!! But it is not inferior, not even a little bit.
I have been a Rider fan since 1960. Apparently, my father had a wee adjustment to a brand new baby showing up when he was 53 and though my 55 year-old foster-mom was the primary caregiver, Dad had to help a bit so when a game was on, he would park me in my little baby unit and together we’d watch CFL. Didn’t matter who was playing but it did matter when the Riders played. But here’s what makes this team somewhat unique; they call it “Canada’s Team”. Aside from sounding nice, there is a powerful reason for the term.
Saskatchewan has exported more talent than any other province. Why? Simple really. The socialist politics meant the term entreprenuer was mostly unheard of so if you didn’t farm and you didn’t work for the government, you left to finder better opportunities. There are Saskatchewan expatriates in every corner of this country, particularly Alberta. So no matter where they play, there is always Rider Fans in the crowd and they always where the colors which is Green & White. They actually have a term and it is called “Rider Pride”.

On August 24th, I had a dream come true. I was invited to speak to the 2012 edition of the Saskatchewan Roughriders. I went into Regina from our cottage three hours away and spent a mere 35 minutes in the locker room with fifity players and coaches following their morning practice. For someone used to fancy convention centres of school gyms, this was a pretty special venue. I can say it smelled different but it was like perfume for the senses. It was all guys and it was a closed meeting so no press or guests and it was an experience that I had to write about today but not to just boast.
Having never played football (I did play a some soccer) and more importantly, other than one season as a pinch-runner for the neighborhood little-league team when I was 9, I had never been on a “team”. I also have no point of reference regarding professional athletes. Like most people, I am a fan, although as a Rider Fan, I admit to being a bit over the edge! So, I did what I always do and that’s speak to the “person” inside the professional. True, I am a professional speaker but I can say for certain that this may have been the most personal gig I have ever done.
The team engeged with me, were polite, had a few laughs, even a couple of tears and in many respects was simply another audience. But when I was done, got a standing ovation and then was presented with a team jersey and helmet by head coach, Corey Chamblin, I had a feeling I have never, ever had. As I took in the moment, Coach Chamblin wasn’t exactly sure how to give me my goodies so he placed the helmet on my stool and I grabbed the jersey under my chin. Just as a bit of background, I met Coach Chamblin in the Calgary airport three years ago. He just happened to be going through security at the same time as me and seeing I had no arms, offered to help, as most people tend to do. He was an assistant coach with the CFL’s Calgary Stampeders at the time and was wearing a red golf shirt with the team’s horsy logo. I was wearing a green Rider golfshirt so when he asked if I needed help, I politely declined but felt compelled to make a backhanded comment about helping him pick a different color for his attire. He was bit surprised at my comment but laughed it off calling me “One of those fans!” and we parted company. Later that morning we met again when he asked me for a business card after finding out I was a speaker. He thought it would be a great message to bring to the Stampeders and wr almost worked out that gig out but it never happened. He then became an assistant coach with the Hamilton Tiger Cats and then in 2012, was brought in to be the Riders new head coach, thus my invitation to speak for the team. The minor theme we carried over was my being very independent and not needing “help” so after I grabbed the jersey, Coach said, “i am not helping you put it on!” So I dropped to the floor, flung the jersey over my head (took me two tries), shook it down and stood up to a thundering ovation. I am a normally emotional guy anyways but what a feeling. I then spent the next hour posing for pictures with the individual players who chose to come up as opposed to being told to and as I was getting hugs and fist bumps, it occured to me…these were fine human beings. These may be football players and to their fans, are Saskatchewan Roughriders but today, I see them differently.

Professional athletes pull their share of stupid moves and don’t always come across as being down to earth but I can tell you that my experience with the Pride of Canada has given me a gift more valuable than any jersey or helmet. The gift of acceptance has been an elusive emotion for a significant part of my life. I simply want to thank General Manager, Brenden Taymen, Assistant GM, Jeremy O’Day (my assistant and guide for the day), President Jim Hopson and head coach, Corey Chamblin for what can only be describes a highlight of my life event.
But the real thanks is to the players and coaches that embraced me as one of their own. I thought I had Rider Pride but it has reached a whole new level. Go Riders!